Saturday, February 27, 2010

Issues of Life: The Life and Joy of Christian Single Women

The Life and Joy of Christian Single Women

This photo was taken by Dave, the one in the foreground, in our Worship Team practice in our church. Can you spot the single women in this photo? Or, can't you?   

     The 'normal' life, according to many, is this: you go through childhood, adolescence, and early adulthood studying from nursery to college, then you get a job, then you get married, have children, then you send your kids to school, then you get old and then go on to be with the Lord (or simply, die). This 'normal' pattern of life is the expectation of those in the world, but this is also the expectation of many Christians.

     In many Christian churches, young adults who are single often pressure themselves into finding a partner. Dr. Jim Rives, in his article in's web page asks, "Are you dealing with a 'force' that is driving you to find a single Christian man or woman to be dating or even to be your mate? There are 'natural' forces within us that compel us to find companionship, and often a mate. God created these drives and they are certainly a part of the inner being of single Christian men and women. However, when we do not keep discipline in our lives, these forces develop their own self-serving appetites that demand feeding". Hmm...that is why even in churches, there are pregnancies out of wedlock. I pray that this blog is talking to those single young adults out there. 

     What about those Christian single women who are already in their 40's and 50's and the widows in our church? What do they feel in the inside? Having no companion, are they lonely, desperate? How do they cope with loneliness? And, how should those single young adults discipline themselves so that those forces will not overpower them? 

     First and foremost, "only Christ can 'satisfy' your innermost needs", according to Jim Rives. We need to draw closer to him and strengthen our relationship with Him--single, married, or with a boyfriend or girlfriend. He is the One who fills the void in the inside of us uplifting our spirit and removing the loneliness; He is our joy! He makes that difference in our life and you can be assured that He'll never ever leave you for another.  He is the One who will help you overcome those dictates of your flesh so you can remain pure for your mate-to-be. He is the One who will make a way when there seems to be no way that your mate will find you. Second, uplift yourself. Go to the gym, learn and educate yourself about dating, beauty tips, about crafting or about blogging, or attend seminars to upgrade your business. Get busy; serve the Lord in ministry, that way you can also fellowship with other Christians. Fellowship, fellowship, fellowship--the way you meet and serve people. Yes, partying is also a form of fellowship but better with fellow Christians. Be happy for the day and look forward to a better tomorrow. Rejoice! Again, I say rejoice! For God has a plan for you.

     I have seen many Christian women friends who are still single in their 50's who have great joy in their life, an evidence that they are coping with loneliness or even have eliminated loneliness. Two of them are successful businesswomen who have adopted babies and raised them as their own. They are now single fulfilled moms who are raising their children just like any other married women, although their role is much harder because they also stand as father and bread-winner for their family. But let me also share with you the great blessing of God upon my husband's brother who found his mate when he was 52 years old (my sister-in-law was 50 at that time, an old maid). They have been married for 4 years now and together they serve the Lord. Nothing is impossible to God!


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